I SAY WE TAKE IT BACK
For those who’ve been a bridesmaid before or (gasp) a Maid of Honor, being asked by another bride incites a host of muffled internal groans and shivers accompanied by ill-forgotten memories of the drama they went through before.
Bridesmaid has become a dirty word and I think we need to take it back.
It was an honor that dates back to Roman times when laws required ten witnesses so a marriage could be legal. The bridesmaids and groomsmen dressed identically to the bride and groom to confuse any evil spirits looking to do harm to the happy couple. Nowadays, it has often become a contest for who loves the bride most and a sometimes a heavy burden of being “the bride’s bitch.”
Can being a bridesmaid ever return to its place of honor so that being asked to accompany a girl on her bridal journey can be a fun, bonding experience instead of a possible drain of time, money and patience. Is there anything we can do to make the change? In the words of our president, YES WE CAN…
So follow me as we chant our Bridesmaids Manifesto…
We WILL NOT be the bride’s slave but rather her guide and right-hand gal.
We WILL NOT go broke but rather plan, save and organize so that every penny is managed and spent well.
We WILL NOT shell out hundreds of dollars on a dress we’ll probably never wear again, that we didn’t have any say in and whose color does not become us. Rather, we will let the bride know what our budget is in advance and ask the bride if she can keep us in mind during the process of choosing so that we can all make an adult decision about what we will look like.
We WILL NOT drop everything when we are called out-of-the-blue to run errands and go on appointments with the bride. The bride can schedule in advance and communicate her calendar with me and let me volunteer to be there when I can.
We WILL NOT allow the brides manifesto “But it’s my day!” manipulate us.
We WILL NOT perpetuate the stereotypical cat-fighting women. We will work together, communicate and be direct and honest with the other bridesmaids.
We WILL rise to the position of honor that has been bestowed on us by the bride.
We WILL do everything in our power to strengthen and maintain the bonds of friendship between the bridal party.
We WILL shine on her wedding day, but NEVER outshine her.
Bridesmaids of the World … Unite!!